What if the parts of yourself you were taught to see as “too much” are actually the parts you’re supposed to learn how to use? For years, I thought my intensity, ambition, and drive were things I needed to control. I eventually realized I didn’t need to become less of myself—I needed to understand myself.

I grew up hiding the pieces of myself that were struggling. When I created Pieces of You, I wanted to give people the space I wish I had: a place where every piece of them is welcome, and where they can discover the messages they need to carry themselves forward.

Sometimes life hurts, and we don’t need a silver lining—we need someone to say, “This is hard.” In this reflection, I share a conversation with adolescents in a psychiatric unit, the candle metaphor from my From Pain to Purpose keynote, and the question that continues to guide me: What will you do with what you’ve been through?

Growth doesn’t always feel exciting. Sometimes it looks like setting boundaries, letting go, and choosing yourself in ways that feel uncomfortable. Here are five signs you may be outgrowing a version of yourself and making space for who you’re becoming.

A painful moment can feel permanent, especially for children. You Will Bloom Again is a story about hope, big emotions, and learning to believe that even after the darkest night, the light will return.

Sometimes the thing that helps us keep going is a simple reminder that we matter. What started as handwritten messages of hope I created for myself has grown into a movement reaching thousands of people in moments when they need it most. This is the story of how one card became a reminder that no one is alone.

For a long time, I thought healing meant surviving one more moment. But eventually, healing asks a different question: What are you moving toward? This is a reflection on hope, finding your North Star, and creating a life that gives you something to look forward to.

Our minds are powerful storytellers, but not every story they create is true. Learn how to recognize the difference between a thought and a fact, challenge the assumptions that keep you stuck, and build a healthier relationship with your inner voice.

Every birthday makes me pause. Not because I have everything figured out—I definitely don’t—but because each year leaves me with lessons I couldn’t have learned any other way. Some came through heartbreak. Some through healing. Some through incredible people. Others through moments I wish I could skip. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that life doesn’t hand us wisdom all at once. It gives it to us piece by piece.

We’re constantly told to dream bigger, work harder, and chase the next milestone. Set another goal. Read another book. Build another habit. Accomplish more.

None of that is bad, I just think we’re asking ourselves the wrong question.

Instead of asking, “What’s my next goal?” I think we should start with, “Why does this matter to me?”